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a poem for the hurt and unwantedyou just want to
no one truly wants me
waste of space
out of place
no one to care
to hold me on my down days
mentally suffocating me
strangling my emotions
my eyes red with tears dripping like
mentality of an adult
face of a fat baby
too many for one
but handled easily
acting with ease
fooling the unknowing
i'm too much to love but
yet better than most
psychological observation from
the age of four
making my loneliness
craving the love i had
that almost killed me
then red and clear tears would fall
because of the lonely heart
sick of trying
sick of fate
sick of time
little blue bird.i wish i could feel again that something that made every day worth waking up to.
someone to wake up to .
someone to live for .
someone i'd have to express these trapped feelings to.
But don't we all ?
am i just being selfish again ?
my tears fall,
my head pounds ,
it's all behind the depth of these lonely eyes.
stare into my eyes and feel my sadness.
unlock the cage and set my emotion-bird free without a care.
i overeact and don't act.
cause i am trapped .
trapped within my cage .
the strong gold bars holding me inside as
i sing my songs .
A long time , little left.attention.
The sweetness of a bitter girl.
the innocence of the wrong doing.
the deterioration of sanity and happiness.
convinced into make-believe.
A mask rotting from false happiness.
The depth of thought.
The hands of a creator,
a mind of another dimension.
A deteriorating girl
with a cracked mask.
Dont Forget Me.You were with me, this time last year.
I had warmth in my heart
and a smile to my face.
Now you've moved on, I regret not being
perfect-you said it wasn't me,
but yet, I still regret and blame myself.
Time is just one thing, andI was willing to
wait, but it saddens me so that now it's
just too late.
My time is over; I am but the old,the past,
but the feelings remain.
I feel for you as you feel for me,
but obviously my feelings are
strong, like the wood on that
Each branch a different story.
When I cried, you felt my pain.
Do you feel it now?
Am I the one to blame?
If i had to choose between the
physical pain of a nerve dying
that you helped me through,
I'd say THIS pain is MUCH
I may have cried for hours then,
but now, I feel like crying
with no end.
Before it was the nerve dying,..
now it's my emotions.
I feel empty.
The past replays in my mind and
I remember being my happiest,
now thats been taken from
and all remain are fake smiles
and real frowns.
LOVE-To give and recieve..If you have love,
love him/her til your lives end,
because some want love,
they want to relive what they had;
the feeling of being wanted,
the warmth in your heart.
i wish i had it again...
trapped.i dont know what to do,
i dont know who to go to.
im sat alone torturing myself with my emotions.
i cry and i want to scream.
its all built up.
but i dont know why...
i feel trapped,
screaming in my head.
i tear myself apart by playing with my negative emotions.
Mental Disorder Discrimination"You said you've got depression?
No you don't, you attention seeker.
You're just an average teenager with the perfect life
Desperately looking for sympathy."
Stop crying, you coward.
You're just a childish "scaredy-cat".
Blaming your problems on a mental disorder
That doesn't even exist."
"So you're schizophrenic?
Grow the hell up, and stop acting like a child
You're too old for imaginary friends
You callow, juvenile, little twit."
But if we're attention seekers,
Why do we try so hard to hide our feelings from the world?
Why do we isolate ourselves in our rooms,
Desperately hiding the cuts on our wrists
Trying our best to live a normal life?
And if we're simply "scaredy-cats",
Why is our fear so vividly intense?
Unlike simple fear, our anxiety will stick with us forever
A severe long-lasting feeling of powerful panic.
A feeling from which we'll never be free.
Suddenly we're childish for having a mental disorder?
Schizophrenia is not something we can control.
YouIf you’re a girl, you’re a girl.
If you’re a boy, you’re a boy.
If you’re white, you’re white.
If you’re black, you’re black.
If you’re gay, you’re gay.
If you’re bi, you’re bi.
If you’re straight, you’re straight.
If you’re religious, you’re religious.
If you’re an atheist, you’re an atheist.
If you’re mentally disabled, you’re still human.
If you’re physically disabled, you’re still human.
For everything you are:
So who are they to judge you for who you are?
to me you are perfect
I do not know the reasons
for all those scars burning
against your bright skin
you've been soaking
a pain reminiscing from past
we both cannot recollect
yet you are so beautiful..
when night gets darker
and I am the one...
who's hungered to undress
the spirit of you
slowly revealing the layers
coming off from shadows
disguised in desires
craving to be fulfilled
I will caress every corner
of your silhouette
until I figure the true shape
of your heart
I will rub those blisters
softly until every nerve
of you gushes into a river
and you moan into a life
I had promised you
years ago when we began
to breathe into each other
for all the truths
I must swallow
and lessons I must learn
you are the one
I am destined to discover
what it means
to love in perfection
PainParalized by the suffering
A shiver down my spine
Images of my past haunt me
No one can save me from this hell
i can't keep walking on these dry-rot bonesoh, i am not a poet;
like the ink scratches
of plath, i am
specter boy: decay,
dispose, & disappoint
because this is the way
that writers wane -
(this hangman head is no
survivor story, & gods
do not burn out
daydreams and monsters.she was a girl.
she ran with the moon,
chased fireflies in the bluegrass, and
watched the reflection of sunsets in rain puddles.
her name was Alice,
and she was a girl.
but to the dragonflies she was a queen,
and to the mirror she was a sister.
the moon was her prince, and the
blinking windows were the eyes
that kept her safe.
she spent her nights making wishes, and she
dragged her fingers along the shooting stars
that were tangled with her vertebrae.
her name was Alice,
and she was a girl.
her body was a river
her mind was an ocean
and her heart was the sky.
she lived in a world where
doves flew in the sea and
whales swam in the
Your eyes...Your eyes...
All the truth no lies
wanting to tell your story
But all tucked up inside...
The am mount of tears
That have left your eyes fall to the ground
As you say that your fine...
The words you speak
That are not always what you truly feel inside
but true feeling ain't meant to hide...
The emotions you put forward from your soul
Sometimes show on the outside...
All the stress and pain shines through your eyes
Being able to understand is the main part that never dies!...
Looking into your eyes to get to your soul to see what's been hiding behind them doors for a little while.... your eyes....
Keep in Touch!
Lilyas has dedicated herself to making our community a brighter place with her vibrant artwork and infectious enthusiasm for interacting with others in our community. It has certainly paid off, as many deviants flock to her page on a daily basis to let her know how much of an inspiration she is. We absolutely agree, and couldn't let all that hard work go without recognition, so it's with great pride that we bestow the Deviousness Award for March 2014, to ... Read More